My answer to a non-believer's question about marriage

okay. I'll attempt this, but it's only my opinion.

As a Christian, I believe marriage is a representative of a higher union - that between God and the Church.

Sex is an expression of love between a couple, and the setting that the Bible proposes within which the highest pleasure can be achieved is a Covenant.

A covenant is a promise, or a contract. And that is what marriage is. I do not know why this is so, but I trust this prescription, because that's what faith is about anyway - trust.

I trust that it is in God's character to give us the best, and not prevent us from having fun. Perhaps one reason he hates sex outside a marriage covenant is because it distorts the picture He wants us to see - the picture of One God and One Church, reflected in the union between one man and one woman.

And just as he would never leave us (the Church) or forsake us, so would a married couple never leave or forsake each other.

Just as he was committed to this love unto death (in the person of Jesus), so do couples vow "till death do us part".

Just as the union between God and man springs forth pleasure, so also the union of a couple (in sex).

Now, it is in this pleasure which flows out of the union between God and the Church that we doubt (myself included). The reason why people desire sex so much is because that is the highest pleasure available to man, so, the more the better! Yet, the Bible says that there is a higher pleasure, and that's in exploring God's character out of the obedience to his prescriptions.

Personally, I wouldn't say that I'm already there, but I've had a taste of it, and it's the thing that keeps me out of sexual sin! Say, when I'm tempted somewhere in the internet, there is a greater surge of desire that causes me not to go there, and that's when I think of my Christian brothers and sisters - times when I could be among them and enjoy the purest, most innocent, and most honest fellowship I've ever had. I know full well that when I engage in this sin, I would compromise on my purity, innocence and honesty, and thereby losing that spiritual bond the next time I'm among them. It will take me a while to recover.

Having these 2 desires to choose from, the immediate pleasure pales utterly in the light of the relational/spiritual one.

So, it's a higher pleasure vs lower pleasure thing, rather than pleasure vs religious rules, which many non believers, and even some believers, tend to believe.

So, if marriage then becomes a parameter rather than a desire, then my answer is - you're missing the point. I might even encourage you to go have all the sex you want, if you really believe that's what brings you the most pleasure and gives meaning to life. But I'll still offer an alternative - Jesus Christ. Wierd? Stupid? Irrelevant? Millions testify otherwise, if not by words then by actions, or even in death.

Peace.