breathtaking

i hope i'm wise.
i want to be wise, like my Master.

for it is the wellspring of life...

love is beyond that cute girl or that good feeling about someone...
love is action. love is sacrifice. love is a choice.
therefore, choose love.

Just came back from cell. We were doing the last of honour's reward by my favourite preacher John Bevere. Thank God for servants like him! Just felt that dispite my mistakes and sins, God still loves me and honours me as His child. What a privilege! He's excited about me just as I'm excited about.. *someone*... and more! hahaha things God teaches you through heart issues. Actually, I already learnt it a few years back. Just some revision and refreshing in this aspect tonight(:

Thank you Lord for cell. It's so refreshing. I love my cell! My leaders MAryann and JeAnnie, my cellmates, my supper buddies, the word, the worship, the house, the dinner fellowship, EVERYTHING!! hahaha! actually I'm also a "leader" but I continue to regard Mary and Jean with seniority... plus 90% of my cell is older than me, so yeah... don't really feel comfortable being called a leader. Don't even know exactly why I raised my hand when they were asking who wanted to be in the Youth Cell Core. Like, i remember the FIRST time i stepped into the room, everyone was like 3-4 years older. To be honest, I just wanted to walk out from Pastor's office and maybe say that I'm sorry for being in the wrong meeting or something along those lines. BUT I couldn't think of a good enough excuse so I sat through that first meeting and continued going for subsequent meetings and now, I'm a "leader". Feels so wierd. I need something to own as a leader, cos I don't know how to lead people older than me. Really. And oh, is it "wierd" or "weird"?

2 years on balancing between JYC and Youth Core. I feel super attached to JYC, maybe cos its been almost 5 years already, but still don't feel as attached to Youth Core as when I was only 2 years into JYC. By 2 years I was super enthu and excited about camps and events and stuff etc etc in JYC... I need a sense of purpose. Maybe I'm supposed to learn from the older ones on the job. Maybe I'm supposed to be the "next generation of leaders". Whatever the case, help me God. I'm out of my comfort zone.

sigh...

and, I don't think I like anyone... for now(: I need to focus on God and His work. If a girl comes by, then good. If not, then my devotion continues to be directed towards Him. Let me not be distracted. I wanna press on towards the goal. Feelings come and go, but the Word of the Lord stands firm forevermore. I will stand upon the rock. In Him I will trust.

I love you, Lord. Glorify Yourself in my life. Keep me from temptation. Let Your kingdom reign in and through me. Let people around me see Your face. Let sin and shame be rendered powerless and let healing and miracles happen wherever I go because of Your glorious presence in my life. Let Your will be done. Let love and justice flow. Let there be light. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen.